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Ugly Dillemma :X

My (now ex) boyfriend commissions a friend of mine for a partial suit because she said she'd do it for little above the cost of materials. But it'd be the first time she'd ever made a fursuit. This was back in November-December 2008 as a Christmas present.

Well, I went along with it. My ex sends the $300-$350 her way and she wastes no time in discussing the nitty gritty about it with me. We chose fur together, discussed things, and she even showed me video progress and the like!

She kept me updated on AIM ever so frequently about projected completion dates. She said it'd be done by Christmas...then New Years, then before Furry Weekend Atlanta, and most recently, mid-late July.

Well, sometime in Jan-Feb, the friend breaks up with her boyfriend and moves next door.

Apparently she's broke and starts taking donation commissions to help her eat and such. Times're tough. She even asked people to pimp her out. In one friend's journal, one fellow had made the plain observation that she had taken previous donation commissions before and she hadn't finished the art for them. Which was true, and indeed shady. In fact, I even commissioned her for something for me and my boyfriend at the time (this was a boyfriend after me and the one who got the fursuit broken up). She had made that journal 2 or so months ago, and she hasn't shown face with the small commission I ordered. Her tablet pen is broken. I can understand that, and the hardships of breaking up with someone you were very close with, and the transition towards becoming independent.

But yeah, about a month or two ago, I decided to note her about the suit since the previously promised due date of by Furry Weekend Atlanta had fallen through. She referred me to a journal that had said she was in the hospital for a serious injury. I was a little insulted and miffed that she wasn't able to give me a more specific answer. I didn't want to impose a due date on her, I simply wanted to know what was up!

A few weeks later she started submitting sketches for folks who had donated (including myself, but I didn't pay her for a sketch, I had paid for 2 icons. But whatever, art's art. lol). I commented on my piece and said thank you. She told me what I had paid for was on the way as well. I took the time to ask her about my fursuit as well, since y'know, that was important too. She told me mid-late July. I was a bit appalled, but apparently she was moving again, this time out of State, so the delay wasn't necessarily unreasonable. Though I had been promised so many completion dates, I was starting to get a little upset, and that one guy who had said she hadn't been showing any progress with the donations she received kinda got me paranoid.

Anyway, TODAY I got asked to get on AIM because she had something important to tell me.

She told me that her ex, who she used to live with, had thrown away all the fur/foam.

I stayed calm about the matter. She apologized and asked about ways to rectify it. I didn't wanna answer right away because I'd been losing trust in her as of recent, and wanted to talk to her ex first, since me and him are pretty good pals.

I talked to her ex, and the full story was basically that while he was helping her move all her stuff into her new apartment, they had left that box for last and they went to take a breather since they'd been moving SO MUCH stuff and maintenance had thrown away the last box (since it was lying around or something I guess). So basically, bam. Everything was gone. He apologized too and offered to fix the situation too.

The head was packed in another box, and the ex-boyfriend has it still. Not the girl who was gonna make my suit. The head is partially done. It's foamed and everything, and some of it is furred. It's missing eyes, a nose and the ears need to be finished.

Now what's got me a little angry and confused is this incident happened BEFORE I had asked her about my fursuit when she showed me that sketch. So she kept that from me.

I don't know what I want to do. I'm kinda through with waiting on this and all the excitement I had for this suit is gone. I still want it, but I really don't want her to be involved in the production anymore. From what I've heard she's not doing good in her current situation.

What should I do about this now? One idea I had would be to ask the friend with my head to send it back my way (I'd see about helping him pay for shipping) and ask both him and the friend who was supposed to make the suit to help split the cost for replacement fur and just have 'em sent to me where I could work on them with a couple local friends who have experience with fursuits.

I apologize if I sound like an ass about this ;___;
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( 11 comments — Leave a comment )
May. 15th, 2009 01:26 am (UTC)
Uhg, that's a crap situation.

Unhelpful: My current policy is not to give friends money unless I don't really care if they actually follow through on paying me back and/or finishing whatever commission
That said, the one friend I did commission my one and only fursuit head from did a nice job on it, and did it quickly, but she's done a lot of suit heads. Other (art) commissions I've ended up waiting a looooong time for, and the only reason it didn't bother me is because I pretty much considered the money a "donation for cool people" (except, of course, I would not donate again unless they eventually followed through.

Anyway, that's totally unhelpful for the current situation, where you're out a chunk of change, the people you gave it to apparently lost most of the materials, etc. At this point, it does sound best to cut your losses and get what work and materials they do have to you. As far as who should eat the cost of the lost materials... it sounds like your "friend" isn't in a position to replace or refund the lost mats, and I guess I don't know how "fair" it is to make her ex do it when it sounds like it was mostly her fault...
As far as that goes, just talk to them and see what they're willing to offer, I guess. It may be you're SOL :(
One question - if you're thinking of having her ex help pay for replacement fur, why give him any more money, even for shipping? Maybe that should be his contribution
(then again, I don't quite know how involved he was in the project - from your post I'm under the impression it was mostly on his girlfriend)
May. 15th, 2009 02:19 am (UTC)
Thing is, her ex(the girl making the suit) barely helped her with anything nor did he know status' and stuff.

Like when I told him she commissioned me he was like o____________o really? She never told me!

and it was like a month after I commissioned her... She hadn't told him a thing.

I'm not too sure..
May. 15th, 2009 05:22 am (UTC)
Yeah. If she was honest it might be worth saying "just get it to me when you can" and being patient, but considering the lies, the avoidance, and the chaos... I'd just take what you can get *now* and be done with it.
May. 15th, 2009 01:43 am (UTC)
Well I think your friend seems to need some stability in her life before its reasonable to ask her to work on it. But I mean your ex paid for the suit so its not like your losing the money, and its you posting not him. I'd give her till July to see if she finishs it and then if she doesn't ask her if you can get the head and see about either finishing it yourself or paying someone else to finish it. That's just about all I see that can be reasonably done at this point. Oh and if she finishes it you can always submit it for a fursuit makeover or get someone else to fix it up for you. I know its a bit late to say but I would never pay someone for their first try at something. I think you should make at least 3 or 4 suits before venturing to do it pro. For some people that number is less for others it is more, but making a suit is a huge learning process, and your first try won't come out looking or being really wearable unless you've helped with other suits or are just a prodigy.
I hope your situation gets resolved peaceably.
May. 15th, 2009 04:38 am (UTC)
The biggest problem seems to be that you were lied to. Not only did she hide the truth about the mats being thrown out, but she blamed someone else for it when it wasn't even their fault. That doesn't sound very trustworthy. I wouldn't be too concerned with whatever action you decide to take.

Is it possible we could also get a name, so we know who to avoid? I apologize if I missed it while reading; I'm somewhat tired at the moment.

Also, is she still taking money for art when she hasn't worked on anything from previous customers?
May. 15th, 2009 01:17 pm (UTC)
It sounds to me like this girl might be one of those people who is always in crisis mode...I wonder if she ended up finding the initial task too daunting?

If she's accepting money and not completing work, no matter how small the project she belongs here.

Are the sketches and stuff called donation sketches?

May. 15th, 2009 01:51 pm (UTC)
Since it isn't your money, your ex should really be the one to ask. Since it was a "first fursuit" from her as well she may just be daunted by finishing the task, especially if parts have been lost of work that was already begun. Sounds like a person that probably shouldn't be taking commissions, or at the very least just do small art commissions or something she's familiar with. I'm really not sure why anyone would take a fursuit commission if they had never made one before. Always best to experiment on things for yourself that (typically) probably find a garbage can afterwards, then work on something for a customer after you know what you're doing.
May. 15th, 2009 03:58 pm (UTC)
I think the thing I find more annoying is that she always posts these READ IF I OWE YOU SOMETHING and never adds the damn people to the list.

Here's hoping both of us get what we paid for, right Koze-butt?
(Deleted comment)
May. 17th, 2009 09:22 pm (UTC)
Main account of the OP here. :]

Well, the ex bought the suit for ME. As an xmas gift. So yeah X(

and I'm kinda hesitant, and cussed me out the other day because someone showed her this.
(Deleted comment)
May. 18th, 2009 02:26 am (UTC)
Ohhhh! He's right now overseas in Iraq, and he's not on a lot of the times she might be on. And only recently did we begin to become friends again (it was a rough breakup)

I guess I'm gonna have to post names :/
Nov. 24th, 2011 06:36 am (UTC)
OP's revealed that her former SO was refunded by Nataya. This is marked resolved.
( 11 comments — Leave a comment )


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