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Unfortunately, much of the communication for this commission was done verbally at a con, but I'll supply a few screenshots that pertain to the situation as well.

I commissioned a friend back in 2017. They told me that they'd have it done by May 2018, but would get it to me sooner if needed. I sent payment for the piece with extra for shipping via Paypal on Jul 2017.

Through-out the commission they offered a lot of reasons why they weren't working on it, including depression. Because they're my friend, I didn't want them to feel like I was dismissive, so I didn't push the issue. When they missed the deadline, I asked again for progress, but this was met with more excuses.

On June 2018 they sent a very rough sketch for my approval. I responded asking for some edits. After I sent this email, I didn't hear back from them. I was unable to reach them until October, when I sent over this email.

They responded with this.

I waited to post here for advice until after December, because they mentioned hoping to have the piece done by then.

I have no idea how to respond here, I'm honestly at a loss.

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( 15 comments — Leave a comment )
(Deleted comment)
Jan. 6th, 2019 07:29 pm (UTC)
I've been thinking about this for a couple of days, and I think you're right on all accounts. I'm hesitant because this person has a /huge/ fan base and patreon. I'm honestly worried about retaliation.
(Deleted comment)
Jan. 6th, 2019 08:09 pm (UTC)
That's a good suggestion. I'm going to add that to my options for consideration. I appreciate it!
Jan. 2nd, 2019 11:18 pm (UTC)
Unfortunately you're well past PayPal's deadline so you really don't have many options and you probably know them all.

Ask for a refund. From the reply I wouldn't expect it but you might be lucky and get your money back.

Keep on them regularly (monthly). I would be shocked if you got anything of quality but you might get lucky. You're more likely to get blocked in general.

Keep on them every now and then (every six months or so). I would be shocked if you got anything of quality but you might get lucky.

Wash your hands of it. Accept the loss of the money, the friend and the art and walk away.

Depending on location of you both and the value there is small claims court and even police action if it's expensive enough.

At this point it's just a matter of choosing what is the least stressful for you and go with it. Re-evaluate what that choice is as needed.

I strongly recommend a beware if you don't receive the art or if they take more commissions before you say it's over.
Jan. 6th, 2019 07:37 pm (UTC)
Sorry for what might seem like a late reply. I've been giving this serious thought over the past few days.

Small claims isn't a great option, I think it would cost quite a bit of time to litigate, and while $70 is a lot of money to me, it wouldn't be financially sound.

They have a Patreon, so it seems likely they'll be taking more work, but I'm not certain.

I'm worried about writing a beware, as this artist has a very large fan base, and I'm worried about retaliation. However, I also don't want other people to fall into this same situation, so I'm still weighing the options work heavy consideration.
Jan. 3rd, 2019 12:49 am (UTC)
That response is very unprofessional and I would be absolutely furious to be passive aggressively told to chill for waiting over a year for something due months ago.

If they still owe things from 2016 and are taking MORE when using the the excuse that they're too depressed to work, that's completely irresponsible. I'd push for a refund or post a beware, because they do not seem like a very good friend to have anyway.
Jan. 6th, 2019 07:42 pm (UTC)
Exactly. I was simultaneously furious and deeply hurt by how dismissive they were in that email. I was especially they over the emphasized "chill".

I empathized, because I also have depression issues, but you're right; it's irresponsible to take even more work when they are unable to finish what they have (especially with some dating back years).
Jan. 3rd, 2019 02:39 am (UTC)
Ultimately I agree with gatekat. But man, did their response piss me off. You were more than professional, and they're telling you to chill? LOL get out.

If you want to wash your hands of the issue but still get a refund, I'd recommend an email like this:

"I understand you cannot give me a full refund since you've started working on it. However, due to the length of time that has passed, I am sorry to say I am no longer interested in the art. Is it possible to get a partial refund? The $70 (full amount) minus what is fair for the sketch you already put in."

Stop there, unless they have a commission sheet that lists sketches as a possible commission. If they do have a price listed for sketches, continue like so:

"According to your price list [link here], the fair price for a sketch is X. I would like a refund of [70 - X]. Thank you for your time, and I wish you the best of luck getting through your queue!"

Then after you get your refund, post a beware on them.
Jan. 6th, 2019 08:01 pm (UTC)
I left comments on their FA shouts over the course of months hoping to get their attention, but didn't hear back. The posts were a little more familiar, and less professional. They were my friend, and I didn't want they to feel like I was just harassing them. At first I thought that might have been why they told be to chill, that they/did/ feel like I was harassing than. However, reflecting on it, I don't think they qualified for an implication that I was unreasonable.

The art I order actually is supposed to be what they label as a sketch. I don't think they actually offer anything like what they've already given me.

I do think I'll likely use that response though, and I'm very grateful that you wrote it up for me.
Jan. 3rd, 2019 03:08 am (UTC)
Depression isn't an excuse, not for that long anyway. I have it and anxiety myself, and even on meds I have very bad days.

I don't take money up front for small commissions, and only take part upfront for larger ones (when I did them). I also watermarked my pics 4 different ways.

It was to keep me from having to refund if I got too depressed about a commission and allow me to cancel when my depression was too bad to actually work. The last time I cancelled was because a commissioner kept messaging me daily despite me telling him I would get back to him with a sketch when I could. At that time I believe I was working as well and the persistence made my anxiety worse.

Either way, depression isn't YOUR fault and she should refund you. When you have any type of disability that affects work taking into account said disability is a major thing.

The fact they keeps bringing it and other excuses up makes me wonder if that's all it is - an excuse.

Especially with the backlog.
Jan. 6th, 2019 08:05 pm (UTC)
I also have several anxiety and depression, and I admit that's why I empathized with them. I didn't want to push them and make it worse. I guess my tipping point is despite many outstanding commissions, they may be taking even more work, and the last email I received from them was very upsetting.
Jan. 3rd, 2019 12:42 pm (UTC)
That response made my blood pressure spike. PLEASE write an actual beware, and PLEASE demand a refund.
Jan. 6th, 2019 08:07 pm (UTC)
I'm very upset by it also, but this person has a lot of fans and I'm worried I might face retaliation. That's why I've been giving it so much thought.

(Edited to fix an auto-correct typo.)

Edited at 2019-01-06 08:11 pm (UTC)
Jan. 7th, 2019 06:20 am (UTC)
If they do, simply block them. The artist in question is 100% at fault here, and if they can't see that as easily as we do, they're just as much a problem as the artist is.
( 15 comments — Leave a comment )


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