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WHO: MintyMudi (twitter), MudiCommissions (twitter), Mixeddisaster (FA, relatively inactive)

WHERE: Twitter DMs, @MintyMudi

WHAT: An adopt purchase, turned into a traditional badge trade.

WHEN:
August 9, 2016 – Present Day

PROOF: Here's an Imgur album, but I will link appropriate images accordingly: http://imgur.com/a/JN1yv

EXPLAIN: On August 9th, 2016, I posted several characters for sale, and MintyMudi expressed interest in one of them. I was asking $20, and they offered $15 and a small doodle, which I accepted. They sent me the $15 promptly. http://i.imgur.com/q7shtqO.png http://i.imgur.com/QAwRZvM.png

ETA: Minty has come to me with an apology and acknowledged their behavior following my previous communication with them. This shows a willingness to improve and admit fault, and I'm pleased that they did so. http://imgur.com/nzOJQvu


September rolls around, and I remembered that they owed me a doodle, so on the 3rd I inquired about the status of that. They told me they’d been busy working, and they’d get to it that week. They offered to do a traditional badge, and having liked the style of the badges they were doing, that interested me. However I didn’t feel like it would be a fair exchange for just $5 worth so I offered to do a badge for them as well and we could turn it into a full blown badge trade. They agreed, and we chatted briefly about characters (I omitted this from the screenshots, it’s irrelevant info), and I completed my half very shortly afterwards. Usually, I send off my badges right away, but having experienced a trade gone awry earlier that summer, I decided to hold on to it until they had completed their half. http://i.imgur.com/35KjtAF.png

September 19th arrives, and they ask me the name of my character. I told them, and they replied that they would do it on their day off the next day (would have been Sept 21). I missed the reply until the next day, the 22nd, and told them that there was no rush. I assumed they had been busy since they didn’t have it done by then. http://i.imgur.com/YK6yGi0.png

October 26th rolls around, and they came to me asking if they could make the badge Christmas themed, to provide examples for MFF badges. I’m not really one for holiday themed things, so I declined and said I’d prefer a neutral theme. They then asked if they could put a snowflake background on it, so I told them again that I did not want that kind of theme. This kind of rubbed me the wrong way, so if my replies look a little short then that’s why. They finished the badge that day, and showed me pictures of it. http://i.imgur.com/YK6yGi0.png http://i.imgur.com/NFUgzSL.png

It slipped my mind for a little while, but mid-November I realized that they hadn’t asked me for my shipping address. I realized that the timing would be pretty poor due to Thanksgiving, then MFF (which I knew they were attending based on their previous inquiries), and then Christmas, so I waited until after all that passed to ask about it. I asked if they needed my shipping address, on January 13th. They told me that they were in the process of moving, but they would try to send it out beforehand. After giving them my address, I told them I would ship mine out after I received their half of the trade. http://i.imgur.com/ndgzQxP.png

So, February 1st rolls around and I ask them again, if they’d had the chance to mail it. At this point I was getting pretty frustrated, because it doesn’t take much to put a stamp on an envelope and put it in the mailbox. http://i.imgur.com/zUnctqw.png

A week passes, and on Feb 8th they messaged me to let me know that they would be mailing my badge out the next week. I was pleased that they had taken the initiative to update me, as it usually was me asking for progress. http://i.imgur.com/eiGOmHr.png

After the next week passes, I ask on Feb 14th if they had the chance to ship the badge out or not. I let them know at this time that I am frustrated with the transaction, and give them the option of just cancelling the trade since I had refrained from sending out my half until I got theirs. They told me that they had shipped it out that morning, which immediately sent up a red flag. It was awfully convenient that they had put it in the mailbox the day that I asked about it. I decided to give them the benefit of a doubt, though privately I was planning on checking out what the timestamp on the envelope said when it arrived. I didn’t intend on doing anything about it, just mostly to confirm my suspicions. http://i.imgur.com/eiGOmHr.png http://i.imgur.com/2TIbX01.png

Today, 2ish days later, Feb 17th in my time zone but not quite 3 whole days later, they DM’d me again letting me know that the mailman apparently hadn’t picked up the mail. For 2 days. Now obviously I don’t have any proof of them being dishonest, but I had a bad feeling about it in the first place, so this was just the final straw. I told them that it felt suspicious, and I was very frustrated. At this point I tell them that I’ll be writing up a beware, and that I don’t wish to speak to them unless it’s confirmation of shipping the badge. http://i.imgur.com/2TIbX01.png http://i.imgur.com/lMk2rCP.png

As the screenshots show, they then proceed to tell me that I’ve been rude and hurtful, along with some comments that are very guilt trip-y. Included in my screenshots are some subtweets about the whole situation. http://i.imgur.com/lMk2rCP.png http://i.imgur.com/yv3dZkP.png

They don’t admit to anything and either situation is equally as likely imo, but regardless of whether they put the badge in their mailbox or not, it’s still been since August of last year. So I feel like this beware is justified. I get that “real life” happens, but it takes so little time to send an envelope in the mail that it quickly becomes an invalid excuse. I would probably have been more patient if it had been something that required boxing up or packaging, but this is such a simple thing that I just ran out of patience. As soon as I receive my badge, I will be shipping out theirs. But at this point I’m not sure when that will be.

So that being said, be careful when dealing with MintyMudi. They are unreliable, unprofessional, and I do not recommend it.

As soon as I have received the badge, I will update this post and ship out my half.

UPDATE: I have received the badge on the mail. regardless of the reasoning behind it not being shipped when they said they would ship it, I consider the transaction resolved. However, there are issues with cutting of the lamination that is fairly sloppy that I pointed out to them. ( http://imgur.com/lgiVQCT, http://imgur.com/WACmX6f, http://imgur.com/suBW6gz, http://imgur.com/zzHp25K, http://imgur.com/OKXFwlW )If this were a commission, I would request it be redone and fixed, but since it's just a trade I don't want to bother with it. They also have yet to own up to their behavior and outbursts, and I don't think they will. So resolved, yes. But still be wary of working with this individual. I would not recommend it until they improve their attitude and work ethic.

Update:
Minty has come to me with an apology and acknowledged their behavior following my previous communication with them. This shows a willingness to improve and admit fault, and I'm pleased that they did so. http://imgur.com/nzOJQvu

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Comments

( 16 comments — Leave a comment )
laughsatthunder
Feb. 17th, 2017 09:25 pm (UTC)
Them attacking you was really unnecessary. You had every right to put your foot down and put out a more mature attitude towards the situation, especially since it's taken them so long to deliver their half when yours was finished, and I don't blame you for waiting to mail out your half until you received theirs. It takes a few minutes to put an item into an envelope and either stick it in the mailbox or go to the post office. You weren't even remotely rude or hostile.
roxyfur
Feb. 17th, 2017 09:48 pm (UTC)
Yeah, that's how I feel about this whole thing. Regardless of whether they shipped it when they said they did or not, the wait has been absolutely unacceptable due to how quick and easy it is to mail something in the first place. I might have stopped being super friendly, and stopped using smiley faces, but I don't feel like I was rude in the slightest. I hope they're better able to react to situations like this in the future.
laughsatthunder
Feb. 17th, 2017 09:52 pm (UTC)
That's one of my pet peeves about the furry community that I had to bring back because I had to start using it business transactions and online interaction: if you don't use exclamation marks or emoticons, you're seen as cold and hostile. I'm an incredibly bubbly person IRL but I take online interactions more seriously. Apparently I was deemed unapproachable for not using those two things.

I agree, and I hope you get your package... If they're telling the truth. It honestly sounds like they got snappy at you when you asked, like you were supposed to read their mind and know that they had shipped it that morning.


laughsatthunder
Feb. 17th, 2017 09:59 pm (UTC)
Oh, and just so you're aware they've already made a Twitter post about how upset they are that you made a beware on them despite that last screenshot.

Edited at 2017-02-17 10:00 pm (UTC)
roxyfur
Feb. 17th, 2017 10:26 pm (UTC)
Yeah, exactly my point. It's easy to read into things, but I wish people wouldn't read that far into things. Just because I'm not using smileys, doesn't mean I'm being rude. :/

And I didn't catch that, seems like they deleted it. Do you have a screenshot? I want to make sure to document every subtweet they've made about this situation, because it's getting a bit ridiculous.
laughsatthunder
Feb. 17th, 2017 10:33 pm (UTC)
I don't have a screenshot, sorry. :[
lackoflollies
Feb. 17th, 2017 10:20 pm (UTC)
If it was just the late badge that's one thing, but that last response on their half was COMPLETELY uncalled for. THAT is why I won't work with them.
roxyfur
Feb. 17th, 2017 10:28 pm (UTC)
Yeah, that's my feeling on the matter. Their response last night was what absolutely solidified my decision to go through with the beware. I hope they can learn from this and improve their online presence. If they want to succeed as a freelance artist, they need to learn to reign it in a bit.
venatorrooc
Feb. 17th, 2017 10:26 pm (UTC)
"I never ship anything out when I promise to and I understand it makes people frustrated."

The fact that she's stringing you along by swearing that she shipped your badge out while also admitting on Twitter that she did not (and has a track record for not doing so despite saying she will), is incredibly frustrating. I can't stand the lying :/

Beware well warranted. The only one making her life harder here is herself.
roxyfur
Feb. 17th, 2017 10:30 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I felt a lot of those tweets were very guilt trip-y. Like I should pity them for not shipping my badge out promptly/when they said they would, even after they admitted that our trade wasn't a priority of theirs. That kind of dishonesty drives me nuts, and is very unprofessional.

Oh, and just a by the way, I'm pretty sure they go by they/them pronouns, not she/her.
talentedfool
Feb. 18th, 2017 04:25 am (UTC)
"I have a lot of stuff going on right now" wouldn't be an issue if they'd shipped it out earlier, considering they had it finished, what, late October? November? If they'd asked for your address as soon as they finished and shipped it out, they'd have one less thing on their plate now.

As someone else said though, them dragging their feet so much on delivering their half isn't really what turns me off them the most, it's the complete turn around in their attitude and guilt tripping that made me :| Really pointed use of language, and a lot of it is making me so angry because, while I doubt it's intentional, it's so damn conniving and manipulative.

"I'm honestly kind of hurt since you're an artist I look up to" - just randomly bestowing some kind of responsibility of conduct onto you to always be gentle and understanding because of the pedestal they put you on themselves?
"Thank you so much for wanting to make my life worse"
"I have been nothing but kind to you [...] you've been rude and hostile to me" once again pushing some kind of onus of care onto you, like, c'mon, twenty might be young but they're still an adult, you should not be expected to baby them.
"I'm a human being dealing with too many problems" you're not the only human being in this transaction, friend, just because you admire someone doesn't make them less human and less deserving of having emotional responses like STRESS and ANNOYANCE and DISAPPOINTMENT. They're expectation that you remain totally and completely empathetic toward them and hold their hand and treat them nicely, while they're allowed to get upset about things is unreasonable and hypocritical. They're not only downplaying their own responsibility in this falling apart but apparently projecting a completely ridiculous expectation of behaviour onto you, using phrases like "thought you understand" and "I thought out of all people, you would understand". They're making bargains ("at least I FINISHED your badge", "I actually sent it out this morning?" < actually that sentence jumped out at me as a red flag, because they open with a "well actually" excuse, rather than any kind of apology or acknowledgement of your wait) to try to gain a moral foothold in the situation, they're being publicly self-depreciation and self-victimising and highlighting their own emotional suffering, making minor acknowledgements of their own fault ("But it's my fault. I never ship anything out when I promise to and I understand it makes people frustrated") allowing them to appear more balanced and reasonable and like they're not having a completely overblown emotional response.

There's a lot of other stuff in those DMs and subtweets that could be unpacked but I don't want to run on too long. I just wanted to highlight some of they key phrases and emotional manipulation going on because they bare stressing just how awful this person is acting. It goes beyond just guilt tripping and subverting responsibility. Again, I doubt they're some kind of evil mastermind doing all this on purpose and genuinely believe they're just completely removing a brain-mouth filter they desperately need to keep a handle on in the future, but man...

I just have dated someone who acted in the exact same way and used the exact same language and seeing it again just made me see fucking red, so sorry for all this! But I felt it was kind of important to unpack exactly what was going on with her language that made this so offensive.
losnyangeles
Feb. 18th, 2017 06:20 am (UTC)
It's honestly baffling how they're just so preoccupied with how this beware hurts their feelings rather than looking at how they could improve their business by keeping this instance from repeating itself. The guilt trips are entirely unnecessary and it makes their business ethic look terrible for tweeting such self-centered ridiculousness. I am thoroughly disgusted by their embarrassing, horrendous attitude and seeing the complete 180 that they did on you as soon as you mentioned the beware makes me livid. @the last screenshot: one mistake won't end their career, but their attitude certainly would. Beware very well-warranted.
ramthedragon
Feb. 18th, 2017 03:01 pm (UTC)
I thnk the worst part is that this could all have been avoided if they just had paid 20 dolars instead of 15, or given you the extra 5 later...or simply have done their little doodle in a timely fashion.

This definitely escalated quickly.
kell0x
Feb. 22nd, 2017 11:47 am (UTC)
Wow, their guilt tripping is pretty bad
devildove
Mar. 2nd, 2017 11:30 am (UTC)
I just have to say, because it hasn't been commented on yet - those lamination cuts are atrocious. She actually cuts into the art itself in a couple places. I would be asking for a refund or for it to be redone if I received that as a commissioner, to be sure, and just because it's an art trade doesn't mean she shouldn't do the same due diligence that any other business transaction would deserve.

The way she messed you around means that she should have really done her best in all other aspects of the trade, and if that's her best then that is very disappointing and unprofessional.
roxyfur
Mar. 2nd, 2017 07:04 pm (UTC)
I believe their preferred pronouns are they*

But yes, I agree with you on all points. It almost seems as if they did it out of spite because the cuts are SO horribly bad. That of course is all just speculation, and I have no evidence to prove that, just me being suspicious.

If it were a commission I would absolutely have asked for a re-do, the quality of the lamination cuts is unacceptable. If I were going to use the badge at all (which honestly, I won't be, since it contains a lot of bitter memories after all of this), I wouldn't even be able to for fear of moisture getting into the badge in the multiple places where they cut into the paper. They also laminated puffy stickers inside it, which creates this lovely pocket of air around it as well. So overall, just horrid quality of finishing, even though the art itself was good.

I hope they work on their quality for future works, if this was just a mistake. If it was purposeful, well that's a whole different situation. Doubt I'll ever find out the truth on my suspicions there, but oh well.
( 16 comments — Leave a comment )

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